Platform One

October 04, 2016

06:12 pm

The laptop screen is the only source of light in this cold room.
 A feel good playlist of obscure bands on the background.
 A cup of hot mint tea on the side. 
Trying to create a peaceful ambiance 
but the linkages of thoughts in my brain won't let me.

That is how my Tuesday night is going. 

I took a break from work today after doing a rush project. This is supposed to be a rest day but just as I expected,
idle time means active mind.

Been reading between the lines and wishing that it is not what I think it is. 
Not yet, please. 

That second photo above reminds me of a similar sight during the morning before my thesis deliberation. I remember uttering these words:

I love how God let me witness
this scene the day before my defense.
It’s like His way of saying:
“You’ll soon be doing something like this”.

Four years later, I am already at this place where this dream is just one stone-throw away. But there has been a plot twist, looking at this scene confirmed that it is no longer my dream. It has now become a platform and no longer the end goal. The skyline is now just a background of a bigger dream- the city. 

"But why are you staying, you asked?"

Coming from a sort of black hole, being on a platform gives you a sense of security. A security from falling again. However, the longer you stay, the more comfortable you become. Up to the point of being trapped in this safety net. 

"So how long will you keep on floating, you asked?"

I don't know and that what makes me so frustrated. You can already see the staircase but the distance between that and where you are standing is difficult to cross. You can't even find a rope or anything to help. 
I wanted to leap but I can't. 

Can't I?

Sarah, get your shit together. 
You can't stay on that zone for long.
 Find a way, create a way, rather. 

You Might Also Like